Seeking description of woman with intention of marrying her


Question :

Can a woman’s appearance be described to someone who is thinking about marrying her? The person wants to generally know what she looks like before he sees her so that he can avoid hurting her feelings if she is not at all what he is looking for.

Answer :

The shaykh hafidhahullah responded by,

“There is nothing wrong with the one asking about the characteristics or looks of the woman whom he wishes to marry and for him which is better than that, is for himto look at her himself, as the Messenger of Allah sallalahu alayhi wasallam said :

فَاذْهَبْ فَانْظُرْ إِلَيْهَا فَإِنَّ فِي أَعْيُنِ الأَنْصَارِ شَيْئًا

‘Go and cast a glance at her, for there is something in the eyes of the Ansar.’ (Sahih Muslim 1424)

As for the one who is seeking the description of women without intention of marriage, then this is haraam and the Messenger of Allah sallalahu alayhi wasallam has made this haraam when he said:

‘A woman should not look at or touch another woman to describe her to her husband in such a way as if he was actually looking at her’ (Sahih al-Bukhari 5241) ”

(We asked the shaykh regarding the one who is playing a middle role and aiding another brother to get married.  For example, is it allowed for him to get the description of the woman so that he goes back and describes it to the brother seeking marriage. The shaykh said- )

“No.  This kind of using of another man (who is not a mahram of the woman) to get the description of the woman is from fitnah and is not allowed.  Rather, if he wants to get the description of the woman, he should use another means. Maybe using another woman from his family members (for this). As for another man getting a description and he himself doesn’t want to marry her. Rather,  he is going to carry it to the individual who wants to marry her. This process is not allowed.”

Answered by : Shaykh Abu Ishaaq Al Qaysee hafidhahullah