Conciling between the people


A brother says:
There are severe problems between my father and the children of my aunties, they cut the ties of kinship and don’t speak to each other, due to severe arguments which have taken place between them, until it reached the point that my father sternly forbade us from having anything to do with them, and said he will be angry with those amongst us that do so until he dies, today I messaged one of them after a year of not speaking and having nothing to do with them.

But I found my self in turmoil, am I considered disobedient to my father as I fell into what he has sternly forbidden us from, or am I connecting ties of kinship?

Bearing in mind I have messaged my cousin, who is the husband of my sister, without the knowledge of my father.

Benefit us, may Allah reward you with good.


It’s not incumbent upon you to obey your father in cutting the ties of kinship, or that of your cousins, without a legislated excuse.


(الطاعة في المعروف)

“Obedience is in that which is good”


(لا طاعة لمخلوق في معصية الخالق)

“There is no obedience to the creation in what is disobedience to the Creator.”

And it’s upon you to strive with conciling between them, and advising them, for this is from the greatest of affairs a person can seek nearness to Allaah, Exalted be He, with.

Allah, the Most High, said:

(لَّا خَيْرَ فِى كَثِيرٍ مِّن نَّجْوَىٰهُمْ إِلَّا مَنْ أَمَرَ بِصَدَقَةٍ أَوْ مَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ إِصْلَٰحٍۭ بَيْنَ ٱلنَّاسِ ۚ وَمَن يَفْعَلْ ذَٰلِكَ ٱبْتِغَآءَ مَرْضَاتِ ٱللَّهِ فَسَوْفَ نُؤْتِيهِ أَجْرًا عَظِيمًا)

“There is no good in most of their secret talks save (in) him who orders Sadaqah (charity in Allah’s Cause), or Ma’ruf (Islamic Monotheism and all the good and righteous deeds which Allah has ordained), or conciliation between mankind, and he who does this, seeking the good Pleasure of Allah, We shall give him a great reward.”

Answered by:
Shaykh Abu Hatim Yusuf Al-‘Inaabi Al-Jazaa’iree – may Allah preserve him.


Answered on:
28th, Rabee’ Al-Aakhar, 1438H

Translated by:
Abu ‘Abdirrahman ‘Abdullaah bin Ahmed Ash-Shingaani